With each child I have let go of a few more little things. Even with just one child I found it difficult to keep the 'memory book' up to date and fill in exactly how much Cohen weighed each month, what date he got which tooth, or who gave him what each birthday. I thought I would remember each precious moment, but when I came with pen to paper, the memories had no dates attached. I filled in each prompt as best I could, with pangs of guilt that I wouldn't be giving Cohen a perfect baby book record of his first years. By the third child I didn't even purchase a memory book, which at least alleviated that particular Mama guilt.
With Emerson, my sweet little second child, I took photos each month of her first year, accompanied by notes for prosperity. I had intentions of doing the same for Oscar, my dearly loved third child. But the first few months flew by in a blur of new routines, broken sleep, school days and market preparation. And, well, here we are with a few more pangs of mothers guilt motivating me to start documenting now, at four months. I know I will be so pleased that I did. I look back now at the months of photos and words I wrote for Emerson and my heart aches a little at how quickly that time passed and the knowledge that Oscars baby days will pass just as quickly. It all feels that much more bitter sweet for me third time around, knowing that my longed for third baby is our last.
My little moon faced Oscar is such a joy. He was made to be a third child. He is so very at ease and rarely protests or cries. He goes along for the ride, usually in a sling, close to Mama's heart. Nothing equals his love of breastmilk. Though he is the first of my children to love getting dressed. His eyes light up and he smiles with delight at each singlet popped over his head and each onesie his arms are struggled in to. He is patient and observant of his siblings. Fascinated by them and pleased if he manages to grip their fingers and get them in to his mouth. If not their fingers, then it is his own he searches for, not satisfied with a dummy like his siblings were. He naps throughout the day - a morning snooze, a long sleep after lunch, an afternoon snooze. He wakes once, sometimes twice, for a feed in the night. He needs no rocking or calming to go back to sleep, while his brother liked to be patted and his sister would only fall asleep on my chest.
At three months he grew out of his bassinet and I sadly moved it out of our room for the last time. He slept in his cot in the room beside ours from that day on, with no interruption to his sleep. He loves his baths. Cohen and Emerson love him hopping in the bath with them and kicking off against them with his little frog legs in the water. Oscar surprised himself, and me, when he managed to roll from his tummy to his side a few weeks ago. His little double chin is terribly ticklish, and his tummy was made for raspberries. He smiles so wide and purrs in response to such attentions.
I see so much of his brother and sister in him. Here is Emerson at four months old. And yet he is so much his own little person, and such a very loved one at that.
