Responding

My mantra this week has been, ‘respond rather than react.’ And as mantras generally are, it is much easier said than done. My twin sister’s yoga teacher training inspired my efforts, after they discussed this concept in class and she reflected upon it with me. It struck a similar chord in me as it had in her. How often do we react without thinking, when we could have paused and responded with much more calm? How often do we ‘fly off the handle’ at our partner or children, only to feel guilty later? How often do we react in traffic, at inanimate objects, at ourselves? To me it seems that 'reacting' is simply identifying the problem and struggling with it, while 'responding' incorporates problem solving.

It’s so much easier to react to a child doing the wrong thing, than to respond and ask them to explain what they should have been doing instead - encouraging and praising them to make amends. Previously my mantras have included, 'just love them', and 'be the parent you want to be.' Each day, each child, each situation, I am learning and growing. Trying my best to be the parent I want to be, meet their needs, treat them with respect, teach them by example, allow them to be children. My, what a journey it is. Challenging, frustrating, rewarding, exhausting, empowering.

I hope that when they look back on their childhoods they will always have felt loved and supported. I hope they know that everyday I kept trying to do my best, give them my best and find the best in them. And perhaps one day I will be able to encourage them and share my hard won wisdom should they have children of their own.

Here's to responding rather than reacting. With time and practice I hope it becomes so incorporated in to my way of being that I no longer need a mantra to remind me.

What's your mantra? Do you use reminders to encourage peaceful parenting?



Photo by Trudi Le Brese

Thistledown Country Cottage

In the days after Christmas it feels like the real holiday begins. The pace leading up to Christmas slackens and is followed by quiet days with simple plans. Dave joins us at home and the children all climb into bed for cuddles in the mornings. Our two year old notes with new surprise each morning that Dada isn't leaving for work. Later nights. Afternoon naps. Day trips and adventures to celebrate with family and friends. Bliss.

Yesterday we traveled to Mount Barney, in Queensland's Scenic Rim, to visit Dave's Mother for her birthday. She is staying at the lovely Thistledown Country Retreat. We enjoyed lunch with her (prawns and watermelon make such a wonderful combination), we wandered the grounds, fed the sheep, explored the kitchen garden and rose garden. We took in the beautiful old home, with it's chandeliered dining room and charming country kitchen. The rain came in gently and the first mist turned into a drizzle. The mountains were hung with clouds, obscuring their peaks. The birds sat dripping among the tree branches and wallabys' bounded picturesquely across lush green hills.

As we drove home and the children napped in the car, I felt the joy and happiness of the season in great measure. Wishing you days of beauty and connection with your loved ones as the year nears it's end.

Weekending

Biosphere by Tomas Saraceno

I used to love working in the City; dressing up, the hustle and bustle, the people watching, the sense of being part of a bigger picture, the constant state of flux. There was always an air of possibility, and I feel it still when we go exploring in the City. There is always so much to see and do, especially if you know where to look.

Saturday there was not only the new Harvest exhibition to discover - complete with children's activities, there was also the GOMA Store Winter Design Market, and Southbank's Regional Flavours. As a result I came home with handmade goodies, beautiful wine, roasted honey macadamia nuts (that didn't last long) and worn out children. 

Sunday we indulged our homebody-ness as we pottered around the house and worked in the garden. It was  so satisfying to stand back at the end of the day, brush the dirt off my hands and the hay off my knees, and survey the two freshly turned veggie patches, the 25 strawberry plants, 12 cherry tomato seedlings, eight baby spinach seedlings and potted flowers.

Yes, it was a good weekend indeed. 

I hope yours was too.

Creativity Abounds

1. The advantages of a sling.

2. Dandelion clock cuteness.

3. Collections at home.

4. Windy days and bonneted babes.

5. GOMA Design Market goodness I brought yesterday - Paper Boat Press notebook and Sharon Muir Owl Vase

It's been quiet in this space the past week as we settled back in to school routines. Good things have been happening though. I feel like I am surrounded by creativity, inspiration and knowledge in abundance at the moment. And I am endeavoring to make the most of it and say yes to as many opportunities as possible.

- I returned to the bench, inspired by a new piece, which will be making it's way in to the shop soon.
- I ordered the remaining tools necessary for my second jewellery bench to be set up - meaning a more productive work space for Didi and I.
- I've booked my ticket for a ceramic artists talk and demonstration. I'm so fascinated by ceramics.
- I'm looking forward to the Calligraphy workshop next weekend.
- The North Coast Mud Trail is coming up again! I'm hoping to visit a few studios this time, meet the artists and see their beautiful pieces, and maybe make a weekend getaway out of it too.
- I'm joining in with Create and Thrive's August photo challenge, #CTMonthInTheLife, to share some behind the scenes shots of my business, workshop and process.

What creative things have you been planning or doing lately?

Stills: A Weekly Collection

1. Dappled sunlight. Siblings playing. A quiet moment amidst the busyness of running a home and a small business.

2. Looking toward the Winter sun

3. Noticing - the marks and textures revealed once the bark has fallen away

4. Black, green and orange leaves - Mother nature knows best

5. Challenging myself to draw each day - it doesn't have to be perfect - I just want to 'make marks daily'

25 Week Bump

The bump is now 25 weeks, and like his little sister did, this bubba is taking advantage of the available space to twirl, dance, kick and wiggle. My bump looks very much like it did last time too (with Emerson at 25 weeks), though this pregnancy 'feels' more like my first one. I feel like it's a boy, but we are waiting until the birth to find out. What a wonder and surprise that moment is. I can't wait.

Third time around and I haven't organised a thing at home yet. I'm quite sure at this stage with both my other babies I would have had nurseries done and clothes ready. But this time I feel no hurry. Around 35 weeks I think we will bring the bassinet in to our room and stow an old wicker basket beneath it for babies clothes and sort through the bags of baby clothes and memories I have saved. 

There are so many little moments I love about being pregnant that I shall miss, as this is our last. So many little things to record and remember. Yesterday, Cohen and Emerson both crawled in to bed for early morning cuddles and we spoke about the baby. Cohen can't wait to meet him/her at the hospital, like he did with Emerson, and "hold it and kiss it just like this", as he delicately kissed me all over my cheek.

In the meantime I feel full of creative energy and inspiration. I am enjoying the current pace, which I know will begin to slow all too soon, and new rhythms and routines will be found with a baby in the house once more.

I have lived...

in my parents home, where I spent my first seventeen years in a lilac coloured bedroom - my favorite colour as a child. We walked to school, we jumped the back fence to play with our neighbors, we skinned our knees on the driveway, we smoked cigarettes in the park at the end of our street. Now when I return as an adult, the same glow in the dark stars adhere to the ceiling above the same lilac walls.

in the ground floor of my a small apartment building, across a busy road from a cemetery. At nights the sounds of trucks and trains would lull me to sleep. There were mice in the kitchen. They had babies behind the fridge. The first night we set traps we couldn't sleep. When we heard them 'snap' we didn't want to leave our beds to deal with the consequences. In the morning trap and all went in the bin. When I moved it took me a long time to adjust to the silence of a suburban night without trucks and trains.

in an old Queenslander, where I grew my first tomatoes outside the kitchen window. I turned the sleep-out in to my studio while I studied at Uni. Eventually I realised I would never be the artist I dreamt of being. I wasn't destined to be a painter, as much as my heart desired it. Instead I started searching for my medium and studied photography, installation, book binding and writing, before serendipitously arriving at gold and silver-smithing - and realising I'd found it. In that house I learnt more about love and friendship than ever before. A little part of me is still there, stepping on the creaking floor boards and looking out the stained glass windows.

in a share house full of uni students. The washing machine broke and we washed our clothes in the bath. I had a Venus fly trap in a small pot on my balcony. A milk crate as a bedside table. I would jump the back fence to visit my friends. I learnt about breaking up, when love alone isn't enough. The nights were coloured by wine, cigarettes, music and talk of art.

in units, cottages, apartments and houses in Ipswich, Brisbane, Greece and the Gold Coast. I have walked their streets, spoken to their neighbours, checked their letter boxes, locked their doors, unpacked and packed within their walls.

in my home, where my children sleep in their beds with toys and blankets that I have made for them. Where I've turned the garden over to fruit, vegetables and herbs. Where I get lost in my own world, working at my jewellery bench in my studio, with the desire to create something new. Where I watch as my tummy grows and we await the arrival of another blessing. And where I see myself, roots firmly planted, helping my children choose paint colours and stick glowing stars to their ceilings.

Finders Keepers Wrap Up

Photo taken by Nic @yardagedesign


My goodies! Test Pattern bib by Curly Pops, La de dah Kids crochet fox rattle (a gift to baby from Kylie), Deadwood creative recycled skateboard bangles (one for myself and one for Fiona for Christmas), Rabbit and the Duck washi tape (mustaches and spots!), doily stamp from The Spring Shop, glass beakers from Kara Rosenlund's darling caravan, and the gorgeous hydrangea was a lovely surprise from Sarah.

If not for the Big Hearted Business morning tea, where Clare Bowditch filled me full of inspiration and challenged me to write down my business plan, I would never have found myself chatting to Nic, Kylie and Jennie afterwards about my dream of 'one day' having a stall at the Finders Keepers market. That 'one day' seemed so far off though. Maybe when the kids were in school and I had more time. Maybe when I had more money. (Maybe when I had more confidence.) Nic asked me why not now? She told me I was ready, and she, Kylie and Jennie all encouraged me to take the plunge. And they continued to encourage and support me each step of the journey from the entrance of Metro Arts to the verandah of The Old Museum three months later.

I hardly slept at all Friday night. I woke up with butterflies in my tummy, which didn't go away until the first customers started chatting and buying. My fears that no one would buy my jewellery were unfounded - we all think things like this in the middle of the night though, don't we? But I felt so welcomed and received such positive feed back about my work. It's so easy too, when you are a stay at home Mum working from home, to feel cut off and loose perspective on your work. It was so rewarding to hear what worked, what people like about my designs and my colourful, vintage-y stall. The bowl of beads to design your own necklace was especially successful and I so enjoyed seeing the amazing combinations that people came up with. And it was really satisfying to see so many pieces find new, loving homes.

I met so many fantastic people too. It sounds like such a cliche, but it's so true. Complete strangers came up to me to tell me that they read my blog and they admire my work (hello!), instagramers introduced themselves and tagged me in their photos, friends and family visited too. I was blessed to have fantastic stall neighbours, Workshop 8_5. Sophie and Johnno were so friendly and supportive. I was especially fortunate to have my dearest twin sister, Fiona, working at the stall with me all weekend. She was the perfect assistant. Not sure how I am going to cope when she moves to Canberra next year...

So thank you once again to everyone that came to visit, brought my jewellery, or sent words of encouragement and support! 

It really does pay to follow your dreams. 

44/52

(The last two photos were taken by Cohen.)

"A portrait of my children, once a week, every week, in 2013." Che and Fidel.

Cohen: "Say cheese!" A camera stamp becomes a mini camera and Cohen the photographer. It wasn't long before he asked to swap my camera for his. I love the images he captured of Emerson and I.

Emerson: Momentarily mimicking her brother, Emerson was more amused with putting the camera stamp in her mouth.

Last week my camera sat lonely and confused on the shelf. Thus the absence of a 43/52 portrait. Some weeks are like that. After five years* of documenting my days, memorising my children and looking for everyday beauty, I suddenly forgot how. Like writers block, mild panic sets in, then acceptance, then eventually inspiration strikes. 

Funny what can provide that inspiration. 
This week it was a camera stamp.  


(*I missed my anniversary! It was the 20th of October. Five years blogging. Oh my.)